Mom and Dad took me to Babies 'R' Us for "Sux 'n' Chux" (bottles and diapers). I don't know why Dad thinks my 8-per-day diaper habit is relevant to my college fund, do you?
Mom bought new glass milk bottles because my Rebecca hand-me-downs contain teh 3v1lZ Bisphenol-A. Hysteria over this chemical has reached such a fevered pitch that it is now touted as absent in everything from light bulbs to hedgehogs.
But I don't care about any of that. I just want the heft of good, old-fashioned glass in my hand when a nursery brawl breaks out.
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