Sunday, November 29, 2009

Come Fly With Me

Some of the relatives were so reluctant to say goodbye to me, they took my plane home. Lee, Janene, and Evan followed as far as Chicago. Uncle Henhuh, Massi Santosh, Anya, and Yash tagged along all the way. Anya won the prize for loudest shrieking on the plane, but I walked away with longest wail. My ears might have been stopped up; I know everyone else was wishing theirs were.

Friday, November 27, 2009

More Relations

I met some of my more distant relatives, from back east. (When you live spitting-up distance from the Pacific Ocean, just about everywhere is back east.) Massi Savita is Mom's brother's wife's sister, and Danielle is Mom's mom's brother's daughter. Apparently neither of them knows the flying game, though, so whatever.


Last night the fridge in our hotel room froze my medicine. I wanted to suck on it like a salty popsicle, but Dad said it'd be too hard to control the dose.

Thursday, November 26, 2009

Gooey, Gooey

Anyone who goes to Uncle Mike's for Thanksgiving risks attending the so-called show. For my debut, I accompanied Mom and Dad as, in lieu of entertainment, they sang this song (to the tune of "Louie, Louie").

Bass line:
(ad nauseum)
Nom nom nom
Nom nom
Nom nom nom

Nom nom

Gooey gooey
Oh yeah
Me gotta eat
Yea yea yea yea yea yea

Gooey gooey
Oh yeah
Me gotta eat
Yea yea yea yea yea yea

Verse 1:

A fine little meal
They make for me
It's fruit and veg'-
table puree [sic]

Me slurp it up
From plastic spoon
Then spit a glob
Across the room

Verse 2:

Carrots, peas
And winter squash
Are just the thing
For baby nosh

Of all the foods,
The best me like
Potatoes mash'
By Uncle Mike


Verse 3:

Me grab me toes
Me drop me spoon
Me meal it take
All afternoon

Me wash it down
With drink of milk
Me tell you, mon
No bovine ilk

Verse 4:

That gooey food
It everywhere
It on me nose
It in me hair

Me take me bath
While Dad mop up
The aftermath

Final Refrain:

Gooey gooey
Oh yeah
Me gotta eat
Yea yea yea yea yea yea

Ga-ga gooey
Oh yeah
Me wanna eat now
Wah wah wah wah wah wah!

High Fashion

Most people dressed up, but I'm the only one hip enough to pull off "gobble" footies. Except I can't. How am I supposed to suck my toes now?

Turkey Day

Lots of Mom's family are here at Great-Uncle Mike's for Thanksgiving. Relatives traveled from California, Illinois, and Pennsylvania, and Grandma Natalie and Grandpa Dale even came up from Texas. I wish my distant relations lived closer.

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

We Lied

Dad had extra fun cleaning my poop off of everything in sight in the men's room of the fancy restaurant. This will teach him an important lesson about volunteering.

'Twas the Night Before Thanksgiving

We got back to Albany just in time for Mom's cousin Lee's birthday dinner. For a fun time, take four children under 4 years old to a fancy restaurant well past their bedtimes. The four of us had fun, anyway.

Moving Up

This morning Mom and Dad moved my car seat shoulder straps to the top setting. One more step on my path to world domination.

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Get Along, Little Doggie

Debbie knows all about flying, but Corinna started teaching me to ride. My beginner steed Matzi is very patient.

I got the headlights on, but I can't figure out how to turn the wiper off.

Fly Ithaca Airways

The morning after we arrived in Albany, we got back into the car to visit Mom and Dad's friends Debbie and Corinna in Ithaca. It was a record two-nap drive.

Wouldn't you know it, Debbie knows the fly game too! Sometimes it's good to be a baby.

Monday, November 23, 2009

Nothing But Net

Here we are back in Albany, for Thanksgiving with Mom's extended family. The card on the hotel desk said something about a fancy adjustable air bed, but I'm not seeing it.

On the other hand, I know I'm surrounded by the elite, if everyone's been as carefully screened as me. Those aren't JPEG artifacts in the photo, they're mesh.

CIO (5)

Game called on account of travel.

Economy Minus

I know airlines are always trying to increase capacity, but this is ridiculous. In the last three months, the headroom in these plane seats has been halved. At least the seat's well padded.

Sunday, November 22, 2009

CIO (4)

10 minutes.

With Help From My Little Friends

The food at this establishment is pretty quotidian, but the service is first-rate.

Another step forward for Toddler and Baby Emancipation: soon we won't need grown-ups for anything. If only they'd move the chocolate onto a lower shelf.

Saturday, November 21, 2009

CIO (3)

10 minutes.

Finger Wiggling

For the past six weeks, Mom and Dad have taken me to clandestine gatherings where people sit in a circle around an elaborate stage and make arcane hand gestures. They claim they're learning a form of communication, but I think it's really casting magic spells.

Better Than Thumbs

So that's what toes are for!

CIO (2)

60 minutes at 8 PM, 45 minutes at 4 AM.

Friday, November 20, 2009

CIO (1)

45 minutes at 7 PM, 60 minutes at 3:30 AM.

Monday, November 16, 2009

Rock On Mom [sic]

We played Rock Band at Ted's birthday party. I remember something like this from about 9 months ago, only it was a lot darker and more muffled. Mom would be able to sing better now, if I weren't still leaning on her diaphragm. Don't worry, I'll help out with the high notes.


I had a great time at Ted's birthday BBQ. Everywhere I turn, someone knows the flying game!

Sunday, November 15, 2009

Accessory Package

Check out my stylin' ride. It's fully loaded with sun shade, chin rest, and wet bar.

Saturday, November 14, 2009

Candy Buttons

Dad got out the box of winter clothes in preparation for my visits to relatives in the Frozen North. He promised me I'll fit in better dressed like this.

Thursday, November 12, 2009

Health Food

They say carrots are good for the eyes. I wonder how they are on chins and ears? Lean closer, Dad.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Deluxe Chin Rinser

Chin rinsers come in do-it-yourself models, too, with convenient handles. Plus, this one doubles as a giant pacifier.

Chin Rinser

Sometimes after Mom or Dad has been smearing carrots or oatmeal on me for a while, they'll use one of these to dribble water down my face. What an amazing world, where they make special gadgets just for rinsing chins.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

I'll get the tip

Grandma and Grandpa took me out for my very first meal of restaurant fare. This oatmeal tastes way better than the glop I get at home. Plus, it's decorated with sparkly brown crystals. Can somebody please tell Mom and Dad about brown sugar?

Sunday, November 8, 2009

It's all relative

Great Uncle Dave and Auntie Pam left Paradise to visit me. I'm worth it. Okay, he being Grandma's brother may have been a minor factor. They took me to visit the California Academy of Sciences. It was scientifically academacious.

Also, happy birthday, Dad. You don't look a day over eighty-one times my age.

Saturday, November 7, 2009

Let the Good Times Wobble

Grandma and Grandpa brought this amazing piece of multimedia entertainment technology. It sings songs and blinks lights and wobbles around all by itself. It's like a drunk Fred Astaire in brightly colored plastic. It'll help keep Dad entertained while I'm away at day care.

Pooh-pooh to poo

There's "solid" and then there's solid. Today I had my first solid poop, with actual form and structural integrity. A bona fide turd that you can pick up with your fingers like a Tootsie Roll. And Dad would have done exactly that and taken it to show to Mom, but I talked him out of it. Some tidings trump sleeping in, but I doubt this is one of them.

Sorry, no photo of this one either.

If you think two poop stories and a barf in three days is a bit much, you're in good company. It's all my editor's fault. This is probably the end of the line for scatological milestones until potty training begins.

Friday, November 6, 2009

Grandma & Grandpa R

Grandma and Grandpa R came to visit me. Woot, 2-day furlough from the MSDF and lots of snuggles for me.

As I'm a princess, I thought they'd like it if I introduced them to The Duke. Come for the cider, stay for the flocking.


This must just be the week of superlatives. I had a 3-oz. projectile puke all over Dad this morning. That's a record, too.

Call me Van Winkle

Yawn! I slept for 11 consecutive hours last night without waking up. That is a personal best. Mom got 7 hours of sleep. That's a record, too. Now, if you'll excuse me, it's nap time.

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Peas Porridge Poo

It's been a while since I blogged about poop. Not that everyone doesn't enjoy a good poop story, but there hadn't been much change on the backside front. I'm not going to gratuitously talk about excrement just to make my fans happy. I have standards, ya know.

Nevertheless, with pleasure I announce my first green and pasty, stinky, solid-food poop. (Well, mush food anyway. I want to meet the genius who decided to call vegetable purée "solid".) Dad assures me that this is olfactorily an order of magnitude more vile than the cheesy stuff I had before, and that makes it special. He's looking forward to the next 2 years, I can tell.

In unrelated news (Dad hopes), I have expanded my food repertoire to include green vegetable goo in addition to orange and white. It looks to me like in-one-orifice, out-the-other, but Dad assures me that the incoming stuff is peas.

Long Shot

Two more shots today. Aren't I lucky?

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Aunt Sadie Wants You

We take our civic responsibilities very seriously here at SARGworld. Whatever mess you create, my generation inherits. That's why I'm voting party line on the Moxy Früvous ticket. You can give me my chocolate eclair any time now, Dad. Any time.

Sunday, November 1, 2009

Peter, Peter

I started eating orange vegetables this week, and now they're turning the tables on me.

Is this thing bigger on the inside than the outside?