Baby passport photos

Look, I'm the Brady Bunch!

Mom and Dad thought it would be hard to take a photo of me that meets all the requirements for a U.S. passport. I didn't want to disappoint them.

They started out laying me down ("nothing used to support the baby can appear") on a white sheet ("plain white or off-white background") in the front yard on an overcast day ("avoid shadows on face; avoid shadows in background"). Even cloudy, the sky was too bright for me to look up at ("eyes should be open"), though, so that was doomed.

Next they tried having Dad hold me on the sheet in his lap, but the wrinkles made too many shadows.

Finally they leaned a piece of white foamcore board against a table and propped me up against that. I'm just good enough at sitting on my own that they could snap a few pictures before I toppled. I knew they wanted a challenge, though, so I concentrated on watching the neighbors, the trees, my toes, and anything else other than Mom, Dad, or the camera ("head should be positioned directly facing the camera"). When I couldn't look away, I laughed or drooled, and when all else failed, I got cranky and scowled ("have a natural expression").

After a few dozen tries, they gave up and brought me inside for a nap.

As it turned out, they did manage to take one picture that seems to fit the bill. In the collage above, it's the second from the right on the bottom. Stay tuned for a report on whether it's accepted.