The good news is, the pediatric urologist says all my parts are working normally, unaffected by my spinal lipoma.
The bad news is, in order to find this out, he put catheters in places best left undescribed and, let's just say, turned the ebb tide. Repeatedly, over my vigorous protests. While Dad cheerily chatted with him about mutual college friends. I am so going to remember this when I'm the grownup and Dad's having prostate trouble.