Day 0

Day 0. I was born. Why day 0, and not day 1? I was born by C-section, and counting starts at 0 in C. Don't look at me like that, Dad made me say it. It's a computer thing.

C-section means I got to claw my way right out of Mom's tummy just like in the movie Alien. It also means I was born around lunchtime after zero hours of labor. All Mom had to do was fast all night and let the doctors play mumblety-peg on her. The hard part comes over the next weeks.

In the operating room were Mom, Dad, three doctors, two nurses, and a tech. If it takes a village to get a child out of Mom, it's going to take a county to raise one.

My saga starts long before day 0, but that's best left for another time. For more about making babies, check your email: You probably have 36 messages from friendly strangers about it.

If you are reading this, you are probably a big person, which means you want to know boring details. Okay, I'll humor ya.

• Name: Sara Adelaide
  
• Date/Time: April 29, 2009, 11:28 am
• Location: Kaiser Permanente, Santa Clara, CA
• Weight: 2310g; 5 lbs 1.5 oz.
• Length: 46 cm; 18 inches

Sara comes from my great-grandma Sara on Mom's side, and Adelaide comes from my great-grandma Martha on Dad's side. It's not obvious to me, either. You'll have to take Dad's word for it.

Tearing my way out of Mom made me so hungry, Dad fed me a half-ounce of formula right there in the operating room. Yum yum.

Bonus points: I was born with a skin-tag tail. Massi Santosh says that means I have the blessing of the monkey god. I'm cool with that. When you're 5 lbs, you take all the blessings you can get.